3 Months later…Time Marches On

Well, I’m still here.  The weather has changed from those sweltering 113 degrees the week she passed, into a few days of the 40s. I don’t feel stuck in neutral anymore, but…I don’t feel like my old self either.

I’ve made a lot of excuses to draw into myself, and to my family the last 90 days and the unfortunate reality is, if I’m drawing into ME, I’m also drawing away from Him.  and that isn’t ok.

So, how am I?

I don’t know.  I see your healing miracle, and it offends me.

I see the pics of you with your 90 year old parent, and it makes me sad.

I ask why, still…but not as often.

There is a battle between “He is sovereign,” and “why.” He is sovereign is taking over but, why isn’t going down without a fight.

I’ve seen a lot more of Dad, and that’s been a true blessing.  I’ve been a lot more intentional about some thing, but others have gone by the way side.

I’ve been pretty undependable.  And for that, I am sorry.  If I missed you, I probably just forgot.  For about 60+ days, my brain was just…..off.  Extra forgetful.  But, it’s not for lack of effort.

My commitment to diet and health, has sucked. I’ve spent more time on social media than with the Lord.

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